the day started like any other at 4:30 am.
(i’ll just continue as you take that in–that’s right–every day!)
and then i saw it on the counter.
i called my husband, nearly speechless.
“WHAT IS THE DEAL WITH THIS STUFF ON THE COUNTER?”
in his defense, he did ask if it was ok last nite. not that he has to “ask”, but common courtesy dictates that he would do just that. plus any man with half a brain knows not to mess with a woman who is trying in earnest to do what i’m doing.
you see, i’ve been dieting (“it’s not a diet–it’s a “live”-it”)
and there
in plain view
was
CAKE.
T. said last nite, “can i make this cake if i hide it?”
now before you ask, “why would one HAVE cake in the house if they are trying to behave foodily?” the answer is twofold.
1. i “need” to have it for h. if things come up in school, and she needs her own cupcake b/c of her allergies, i need to have stuff to make them. sometimes, i truly can’t motivate to get to the store.
2. i’m a lady now. when i go to people’s homes, i try my best to bring something. and i’ll be damned if i’ll stop on the way to someone’s house when i’m late anyway (b/c i have two kids) and stop into a store (with the aforementioned kids) only to buy something that my kid not only can’t eat but has to be kept away from as well (btw, she broke out on the way home today, sheil)
anyway, so i had an impromptu playdate and decided to bring the cake and what is a cake without………..you guessed it………frosting!
so i whipped up some frosting. i just combined some nutmeg, sugar, brown sugar, fairy dust, and two shakes of a lamb’s tail………..had you going there huh?
this is not beth’s blog!
i have no idea what ingredients to put in my pretend frosting.
i microwaved the frosting in the cabinet and poured out every last bit of that sucker. well, besides the large quantities that i immediately consumed.
and that DAMN sheila made me take half of it home today.
so at around 3, holly was watching pinky dinky doo, and jack was taking a vacation from my right hip and was actually occupied, i sat down with a cup of hot (for a change) coffee and a piece of cake and ate it.
in peace.
like a regular person.
with a plate.
(as opposed to standing over the cake pan shovelling it in like there was some sort of prize being offered)
and afterwards, i was so happy.
and so energized.
and was literally dancing.
and it was a regular size.
i didn’t just gom half a cake. it was like a regular person eating cake. not some maniac who has been on a diet for nineteen years.
(that’s right–count em–NINETEEN!)
and i had the thought that maybe i could become a regular person who could eat one piece of cake………..
just eat one and not think about it the rest of the day………either because i want more or because i feel so guilty.
just put down my fork and think, “mmmm, that IS some tasty cake.”
or say, “sure, i’ll have a bit of cake–why not? it won’t affect my entire week.”
or not finish (read: “lick ) the entire plate. maybe leave a morsel or two.
but i don’t think i’m to that place yet. maybe in another nineteen years or so.
here’s the babies, for those who come not for my thoughts, but for the children.
as usual, if you like what you read, give a shout out. don’t be shy.
